A Simple Shift That Makes You
Instantly More Attractive
By Rori Raye, Author of best-selling eBook Have The Relationship You Want and free newsletter.

If you’re spending a lot of time and energy thinking about a guy, you might be alarmed to hear that it makes you less attractive…even if he doesn’t even know you’re thinking about him! Here, Rori Raye shares a simple Tool that shifts you out of over-thinking and makes HIM start thinking about you.

If you’re at all like me, a predictable thing happens to you when you start dating a new man you like. At first, you’re all excited, there’s a spring in your step, and you feel all aglow. People ask you what you’ve done differently.

But then, as you get to know him and become even more interested and invested in him, something else happens. You start to think about him all the time, you begin to worry that you might mess things up, and you’re constantly wondering what he’s thinking about you. You talk about him with all of your friends, dissecting his every move. But there’s no harm in it, because he knows nothing about this - right? Wrong.

OVER-THINKING CHANGES YOUR VIBE

When you think about a man too much, several things happen. Emotionally, you become drained from all the analyzing. You have less energy for the other things in your life - the passions and people that made you the person he was attracted to in the first place.

At the same time, your self-esteem goes down. Why? Because you start hanging your self worth on whether or not things will work out with this one guy. You go from the carefree, spirited woman you are to a fearful, worrying creature. And it shows. Believe it or not, a man can sense when you’re doing all this internal acrobatics about him. Your thoughts affect your feelings and your mood.

But telling yourself to stop thinking about him isn’t so easy. You need a two-pronged approach: a way to stop yourself from focusing all your attention on one man too soon…and a Tool to boost your self-esteem so that you’re being your most attractive you.

WHATEVER YOU DO, DON’T STOP DATING

Once you’ve found a man you think is a potential keeper, it’s tempting to clear out your calendar for him and not even consider other dates. But this is exactly what makes you become fearful and worried about whether he’s going to call and what’s going to happen next. Result: you can’t stop thinking about him, and he’ll pick up on the fact that you’re hinging on his every move.

That’s why you absolutely need to keep connecting with other men and going out on dates with them. When you do, you’re immediately taking the pressure off both you and the guys you’re seeing. It will stop you from over-thinking about any one man, which means you won’t have that clingy, fearful, unattractive vibe I talked about before. The fact that you’re on eHarmony means you have a fantastic Tool at your disposal to keep yourself from prematurely cutting off your options. Use it!

THINK OF YOURSELF AS THE PRIZE

Often, and especially when we meet a man we think could really be “it,” something inside us immediately starts to sabotage it. It’s what I like to call the “nasty voice,” and I’m sure you’re familiar with it - it’s that negative-thinking part of you that says you aren’t good enough to have all the love you deserve from a truly wonderful man.

Well, you do. And since I like visual Tools, I want you to think of your favorite dish. Let’s say it’s chocolate cheesecake. Think of everything you love about chocolate cheesecake and what makes it so wonderful. Who wouldn’t want a piece of that? Same goes for you. Now, whenever you are feeling overcome by feelings of inadequacy, I want you to immediately think of that dessert and say to yourself, “I am the chocolate cheesecake!”

I know this sounds silly, but believe me - it works. It’s so silly, that it will instantly lighten your mood and hence your vibe, so that you really do loosen up and become instantly more attractive. It’s similar to what happens when you’re walking down the street and you’re remembering that great kiss you had with your guy. Instantly, a smile washes over your face and people want to know: “What did you do differently?”

There are specific things you can do to raise your self-esteem that will make you irresistible to a man. To learn more, subscribe to Rori’s free relationship advice e-newsletter. You’ll discover a whole new way of relating to men that will make you feel better about yourself while you find the relationship of your dreams.

The saying “The teacher appears when the student is ready…” is oh so true.  The other month I ordered this book titled A Practical Guide To Vibrational Medicine Energy Healing and Spiritual Transformation by Richard Gerber, M.D..  It has a great chapter on light and colored light therapy which has interested me for years.  I am a practioner of tonations or colored light therapy. 

The other day we had a lunch guest and she started talking about energy healing, which she is now doing for a living.  She’s just recently added that to her other modalities.  We were talking about how all foods and drinks have vibrational properties that are transferred to the human body at consumption of these foods and drinks. 

She said “coffee” brings down a person’s vibration substantially.  You want your vibration to be as high as possible.  She went on to say every food has an effect on our vibrational auras and some foods increase our vibration.  When she left, I got into my book here looking for food information.  It does not contain that so I’ll ask her what title she’s reading and order that book.  I did find this great excerpt from the above mentioned book to share with you:

“…But our cells are fed also by a continuous stream of life-force energy.  We posses a variety of specialized energy-distributing systems that also support the cells and organs of our bodies.  These energy systems are affected by different factors that can enhance or inhibit the flow of life-force energy to the cells and organs of our bodies.  Among those critical factors are such things as our emotions, our relationships to others, our ability to give and to receive love, and even our relationship with God….” 

If you are on a quest for good health, great energy and the will to accomplish much, this is a great book.  ~ R